The Gift – I am Strong – Movin’ On

Sometimes people think that the journey of transformation is a direct path up the mountain.  They are upset and depressed when they experience a rock slide downward.  So has been my journey of transformation.  I’ve come to understand that often there is a gift in the rock slide as long as I don’t focus on the slide.   Sometimes the pain of the slide that becomes my reality.  Working through that pain is where I find the pearl – the truth I need to see and that truth is what propels me back up the mountain once again moving towards higher places.  Sometimes on the journey to the higher places, I have to leave people and places behind.  Sometimes by my choosing and sometimes by their choosing and today it is the latter.   I think one of the most difficult things for a person who grew up in abuse and abandonment is learning to trust and love with the heart.  It seems like it is an act of congress and when I finally open to that, it is hard when I find the same thing I’ve always found.   In the midst of the sadness I find a new friend.  I find I am stronger than I ever have been and more resolute then I have been. That is the gift for me:  Embracing my feelings, seeing myself, loving me.  Proud I was vulnerable enough to speak the truth from my heart regardless of the risk.  The risk was great and now I walk without my friend and yet I don’t walk alone. I’m movin’ on!

 

Movin On” By Rascal Flatts

I’ve dealt with my ghosts and I’ve faced all my demons
Finally content with a past I regret
I’ve found you find strength in your moments of weakness
For once I’m at peace with myself
I’ve been burdened with blame, trapped in the past for too long
I’m movin’ on

I’ve lived in this place and I know all the faces
Each one is different but they’re always the same
They mean me no harm but it’s time that I face it
They’ll never allow me to change
But I never dreamed home would end up where I don’t belong
I’m movin’ on

I’m movin’ on
At last I can see life has been patiently waiting for me
And I know there’s no guarantees, but I’m not alone
There comes a time in everyone’s life
When all you can see are the years passing by
And I have made up my mind that those days are gone

I sold what I could and packed what I couldn’t
Stopped to fill up on my way out of town
I’ve loved like I should but lived like I shouldn’t
I had to lose everything to find out
Maybe forgiveness will find me somewhere down this road
I’m movin’ on

I’m movin’ on
I’m movin’ on

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5 Responses to The Gift – I am Strong – Movin’ On

  1. Gabrielle says:

    I very much identify with what you’ve just written, as I’ve been there too- a few years ago, thankfully. I’ve written a book about my 14 year journey, which may help you.
    I know all about abuse as well, but through experiencing the depths, we can reach so much higher than most when we hit the highs, that believe it or not, you end up feeling grateful for those depths. Thank you for sharing your experiences.
    My book is here: http://themysteryofself.wordpress.com/
    Much love, Gabrielle

    • Change Through Transformation says:

      Thank you for sharing Gabrielle. It is the depths that teach us so much about our truths. I look forward to reading your book. I, too, am writing a book of my journey. Many thanks, Mary

    • Change Through Transformation says:

      I’ve read a lot of your book, though not finished. I am amazed as the similarities thoght I don’t know why I would be. I am touched by what you experienced in the early years of your journey and experience joy seeing the spiritual connection. I am multi-dimensional as well. There is a reason for our connection right now. I am grateful for your connection. I look forward to reading the rest of your book. Thank you Garbrielle!!

      • Gabrielle says:

        It’s my pleasure Mary. I have no doubt there is a reason why we connected, even if it is just so we know that we’re not alone in what we’ve been through. If I can help or support you in your journey, I’m very happy to do so. Please feel free to e-mail me if you like – lightworker44@hotmail.co.uk
        Much love, Gabrielle

      • Change Through Transformation says:

        Gabrielle,
        Thank you for your support. It is always comforting to know there are others who truly understand. I was acutally going to give you my email address as well. It is maryauda@yahoo.com and would love to connect. Blessings. Mary

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