“Breaking through the prisons that binds us is often done one step at a time. From the time I initially exposed the choices I made and who I had become, the road to recovery took time and effort. The initial breakthrough may appear to happen quickly, but maintaining freedom takes time. There is not a day that goes by that I do not think, in some form, about the choices that I made and how choices affected me and others. Being aware daily of the fact that every choice has a consequence and, therefore, making right choices are the keys to unlocking the doors to freedom.” (Second Chances, Chuck Gallagher www.secondchancesbook.com)
Chuck Gallagher is a good friend. He made choices in his life that resulted in his being imprisoned. During his imprisonment he came to understand that the physical prison was a manifestation of his internal prison. Once he understood that truth, he came to understand the choices he made that led him to his external prison. It is through his soul searching that he could re-connect with himself and set himself free.
Many of us do not have our internal prisons manifested in the external prison with bars. Our journeys are different. My journey is different. My internal prisons manifest themselves in excessive weight, for example. I do believe for some it is easier to walk out of prisons made of bars rather than prisons made of flesh!!!!
Chuck says our choices either become our prisons or they become our freedom. I, along with many others, maintain my prisons through my fear. I hide and I am unavailable for freedom at times. While I have set myself free, there are still areas that I hide who I am as I fear standing in my own truth and it is because I don’t feel safe. Although I have come to a place of safety within me, I am still understanding how that affects my external world. My process with God the other night illustrates the truths I am coming to understand.
God: Good insight into having to feel safe to take care of yourself. That has been true all of your life. You are finding safety with yourself. I wonder as you grow in rest and safety within yourself that you find that is the only safety you need.
Me: Perhaps. Isn’t there truth about external safety. I wouldn’t go to a bar of rapists and lay down and rest. I would be assaulted.
God: Would you or is that your belief? What if you had the expectation of safety and they would just somehow leave you alone?
Me: Faith and trust? That would be hard in that situation.
God: Yes. Think about it. Peace, faith, trust, safety all radiating from your heart and soul. What if that is what creates the external experience.
Me: I don’t know. I know it does. I am connecting to some truth here. We are the artist, the painter, the creator of our life. So I paint Max out of the picture or I make the rapists my friends and they become the protectors. The villain becomes the companion. That is about as radical a thought as we create the play in our life before coming here. This falls into the whole agape love thing – that just hit me. If I / we the world approach all with agape love which would intrinsically contain not only love, but also peace, fearlessness, trust, faith, acceptance – all unconditional. If that be the case, then the outcome is good. It is in the expectation that defines the experience. I get that. “Let there be peace on earth and let it begin with me.” Don’t seek my ego satisfaction. Seek my heart’s desire. I shouldn’t look to Max for safety because I won’t find it anymore than I would find it in a gang of rapists. Instead I need to find my own safety and thereby feel safe in all situations I find myself in because all that I do comes from the center of my soul and my external world is created from that place.
God: That is truth. The light of your soul opens the pathway as your guide. The brilliance of your life is created by love, peace, joy, fearlessness. The light dims when fear, anger, become part of the experience.
Me: I wish it were that easy for me. It is so much a struggle some times. If only my intentions were like magic and all became real at the thought.
God: And if that were the case then all your intentions you don’t want would also manifest quickly.
Me: I know. My intention is to experience safety, love, joy, peace within and let it radiate out of me. And so it is.
The fear of the external maintains my prisons. If I allow the core of me – my heart and soul, to be fearless, love, peace, having faith and trust, I find my freedom and my external becomes the manifestation of my internal peace rather than a place of fear and danger. Today I choose a heart and soul of peace, fearlessness. And so it is.